June

Remember how a while ago I was attempting to post once a week? Well obviously, that hasn't worked out so well for me. So let's just talk about all of June.

1. Mama Emma. Carine's 95-year-old grandmother who lives on the Upper West Side and raised her family in this same apartment. Ever since Sarah and I moved out to New York at the same time almost a year ago, we've tried to visit Mama Emma every so often. She only speaks Spanish, so we bring our friend, Ricardo, with us to help translate. She shares with us stories of her life and time in New York, gives us advice (my favorite being that I need to learn Spanish so I can get a good boyfriend), and always showers us with love.

2. The temple. I went through the temple once I got home from the UK with Carine. I loved having my parents and Gram with me and I loved going through the Manhattan temple where everything feels more personal and like home. I've been coming to the temple nearly weekly for a while now to do baptisms and I started to get to know all the temple workers. President Bean would often come down and say hello while I was in the baptistry and he ALWAYS had the exact piece of advice to my unasked question. He is so in tune with the Spirit, it is a huge blessing and example to me. (Also, what a testimony builder to know that Heavenly Father knows our unasked questions and they are important enough to Him that He prompts someone else to answer them.)

One day when I ran into President Bean after a stake conference where he had, again, spoken on an exact topic I needed to hear (I can't remember what it was now, but I remember just being in awe that he always seems to know what I need), we began chatting and he asked me, "Why aren't you endowed?" I thought about it for a moment and really had no good reason. I gave an excuse along the lines of "I missed the start of the last temple prep class, so I was just going to wait until the next one." His answer? "You know my temple prep class? On the way to the temple for the first time, my dad looked at me and said, 'Son, this is going to blow your mind.' Do you study the scriptures? [*I nodded*] Do you love the Lord? [*I nodded*]. Then that's all you need." He told me, "You don't need to go through right this second, but now is the time to start praying about it."

Well, that was the exact push I needed and I immediately made appointments to start getting my recommend and go through. The temple brings the gospel to life. I had a testimony before, but now everything feels so REAL and important. I don't even know if I can adequately describe it any more than "real." I have since loved going back almost every week.

3. 4. 5. Lab. Double date (more like, excuse to hang out with the lovely Lindsay). Picnic in the park (with surprise appearance from Shakespeare in the Park and its entire audience).

6. Beach Day. Coney Island happened to be having their Mermaid Parade, so the subway was insane and the crowds were (probably normal) out of control. BUT the beach was surprisingly beautiful and nice!! I don't know what I expected...I think I expected a gross beach where you can hardly stand to sit on the sand without a towel. That was not the case. It was beautiful! The water was freezing, but I did not want to be the girl who went to the beach and never got in the water, so I made it a priority to first thing run into the water and get it over with. Turns out, you got used to it kind of after a few minutes (but not used to it enough to spend an entire afternoon swimming). Sidebar: all three girls immediately ran into the ocean and I don't think any of the boys swam, so turn of events when it comes to stereotypes.

I know... three of practically the same photo. But I love them all and this is my blog, so I can do stuff like that.

7. Lab outing (!!!). Shivam moved to New York from India for his masters degree and Martin moved from France to research for the summer. Neither of them had ever been to a baseball game before, so we decided it was time to introduce them to America's favorite pastime!

8. FHE. I've been family home evening "mom" for my little group of blocks and I've loved the excuse of planning weekly activities for people to come hang out with me!! Game nights, ice cream nights, dinner, walks around the reservoir, Yankees vs. Mariners game (go M's!) and much more 🙃

9. Haley's birthday. Bless Haley for welcoming me to New York with open arms! We all went around the table saying when we first met Haley and almost every single person commented, "In my first two months in New York when I didn't have any friends, Haley invited me to hang out with her." 💕 We celebrated with tea at The Plaza! Such a fancy and classy afternoon with fancy and classy ladies :)

10. Smorgasbord. This one picture deserves its own section and let me tell you why. After 3 months in New York, I started feeling settled. After about 6 months in New York, I loved it. But after I started hanging out with Celeste, I truly felt at home. This smorgasbord day is still referenced often. We both were going home to an empty house and a pretty bleak dinner. Sooo instead we brought our bleak dinners together and came up with a pretty delicious and filling random smorgasbord dinner!

John came over later with fancy potatoes and veggies to share with us, which was very kind and much appreciated, but first
we had him take a picture of our well-rounded and nutritious meal of tamales, rice, golden grahams, and ramen noodles. 

11. Krista's graduation. Congrats, Krista!! Also super nervous to try to attempt to do everything Krista knew how to do without her around to show me the ropes. Gerard said to us, "Courtney, make sure you learn everything before Krista leaves." Everything. Daunting. (But also exciting!)

12. Visited home. ❤️

The trip we keep forgetting about

We went to Europe for two weeks. It was an incredible trip, yet somehow we both keep forgetting it happened. Probably because it was more like a dream than reality!

London (stayed with Chandler) -- chunnel --> Paris (coincidentally met Kay and Chuck) -- chunnel/car --> Manchester --> Glasgow --> Bristol (stayed with and met up with study abroad friends) --> Brighton --> London

I started going through photos deciding which to include... and I couldn't decide. So I made a video instead :)

Possibly better quality here: https://photos.app.goo.gl/5mtQmF9a4rHme2Xu5

T-Minus 8 Months

Birthday Weekend

Twenty-three is a good number. It looks nice written out (23...yes.), it's nice to say, and it's odd. I have a feeling it's going to be as equally as good of a year as it is a number. For one, my first weekend included dinner with my favorite ladies (pictures missing a few!) and partying with my family all weekend.

Each time my brothers have visited, they ditch Mom and Dad at a hotel and come stay with me. We hang out all day and sometimes see my parents for dinner or in the evenings. I love the time I have to myself with just the boys, but also I would never want to go any amount of time knowing that my parents are in the city without any plans to see them!

Matching with Bailey. It's pretty hard to tell in this lighting, but take my word for it.

Bailey, Lindsay, and Hannah <3 

Twinsies.

World Trade Center

Talks of Christopher working here one day.

Homework needed to be done. But I also didn't want to wake the boys. Soooo homework in the tub.

This night will forever be burned as a beautiful pocket memory in my mind. Sitting with my family in my little living room
playing Psych and eating ice cream. The perfect evening.

Late Nights

Lily and I have been working on a mini project to design and build a cervical dilation device to help induce labor mechanically. It's pretty cool to briefly get to work on a project that has nothing to do with what I'll be studying for the next several years. It's also pretty cool to work with an undergrad who knows all the in's and out's of the campus like undergrads do. One late night when we needed a break, Lily took me to the roof of Mudd 😱🙃

PH.D. AHHHH!!!!

Okay, I was going to try to be subtle in the title and make you guess what was going to happen next while you read this story, but truth is, I'm just too excited to keep it a surprise. I'M DOING MY PH.D. AT COLUMBIA!!!!

Alright, alright, let's step back. Here's what happened. I've been thinking for the last little bit about what I want to do after graduating from Columbia. At the same time, I've been working in a research lab and LOVING it. I never expected to love research - my first exposure to research was fine, my second lab was good, but this one has been great. I have finally found my niche within the research world -- biomechanics. Not to mention, I love the lab environment and culture of MBL.

It all began with Spring Break. I had tentatively been planning to fly out to Seattle and road trip to a nearby national park with Carine. When we started planning, I just couldn't pull the trigger. Our lab was getting ready to submit a really important grant proposal and we still had a lot of work to do. I decided I would feel better staying in New York over the break and just working in the lab. Shivam, another masters student, stayed as well and we worked hard and long with Krista and Brandon (both Ph.D. students in the lab) to pull together all the data and analysis we needed. We finished everything in the nick of time and were able to submit with data we could be pleased with! In passing one evening, I said to Krista, "It's so nice to be able to just come in and work in lab all day without worrying about classes!" Her response? "That's how you know you're ready for a Ph.D."

I had been thinking about that for a while, actually. I loved the lab and was loving what I was doing. A Ph.D. really would be amazing. But could I work in Professor Ateshian's lab? By the time I decided I was interested in the idea of pursuing a Ph.D. the deadline had already passed for applying to all the schools. I'd have to wait and apply the next year, find something to do in the 6-month interim between my M.S. graduation and starting a Ph.D. program. I just couldn't shake the idea, though. Yes. I wanted to pursue my Ph.D. But, I wanted to do it at Columbia and in my current lab.

Once I decided that though, I realized that's not exactly my entire decision to make. I couldn't guarantee that Gerard would want me as a Ph.D. student. I had been working hard and trying to make a good impression, but was it enough for him to want to spend the money to fund me? Was there even money available? Okay, so none of those questions could really be answered right away. Suddenly though, a Ph.D. was exactly what I wanted. The thought had been placed in my mind and it felt so perfect. I decided I needed to start looking into other schools and programs to see if there was anywhere else I could see myself going. It took me a little bit to become okay with that idea, though... I was just starting to feel like New York was my home and I wasn't ready to move away yet. But, I needed to stay open-minded.

Soon enough, interview weekend rolled around and prospective Ph.D. students were coming from all over to meet with the different professors about potential Ph.D. positions. I was getting antsy. Working by the mechanical testers just a couple days before I had said to Brandon, "I secretly hope that Gerard doesn't like any of the students or that the ones he likes choose not to come here." He laughed with me. It was selfish, but it was true. I felt like that was my only hope to be able to pursue my Ph.D. in MBL. Krista also knew I wanted to get my Ph.D. She pointed out, "Courtney. Today is interview day, so Gerard will be thinking a lot about next year. He might not know that you're even interested. I think you should go up and talk to him today and just make sure he has you on his radar." Ooooh man, that made me nervous. But she was right. I hadn't ever directly said to him that I was interested because I had just assumed that I missed my shot. If I wanted any sort of chance to be considered (sans application), I needed to let him know. I went up soon after and our conversation went something like this...
"So, I was wondering... I've loved working in this lab. I would love to continue on in my education to do my Ph.D. somewhere. I know that you're interviewing other students and I decided that I wanted to do my Ph.D. much too late to apply, but I really would love to do my Ph.D. in your lab. Hypothetically speaking, say that you don't fill both spots that you think you want to fill during interviews, would you possibly consider me for a position? Hypothetically of course. I don't expect anything. I just want you to keep me on your radar."
"Hypothetically speaking, if I had the money, then yes, I would possibly consider it."

I had been so nervous. But he didn't say NO! That was all I wanted. I was ecstatic. Krista asked, "How did it go??" "He didn't say no!!" "Well that's not bad!"

Although, after interview weekend it seemed like there were multiple great students who were very interested in working in this lab. That was disappointing. (I mean, that was great for them...but I was disappointed that they were so great haha.) I lost hope for magically getting a Ph.D. spot for the next year. I'd have to graduate with my masters, then apply like everyone else.

A couple weeks later, Brandon was complaining to Krista briefly about how he had so much work he needed to do, but didn't have the time and how he really just needed a masters student to take it over. I overheard. "Hiiiii me me me please!" "Oh duh! You of course should be the one to help me with this! I don't even know what I was thinking or why I was complaining before. You were the obvious choice." (Those may not have been his exact words...but you get the point 🙃). Turns out, he needed some help recreating some Solidworks models and prototyping them. Well, Solidworks is something I'm actually pretty comfortable with and I was able to complete the task quicker than Brandon had been expecting. It was a pretty simple task, but not gonna lie, I was quite pleased with myself for that. One evening I was working on the prototypes and showing Brandon them when Gerard came down.

"Oh Gerard, perfect! I was just wanting to show you what I was working on!"
"Oh that looks good..." blah blah blah we all talk for a few minutes about the prototypes and the project until Gerard switches the conversation... "So actually that's not what I came down to talk about. I wanted to let you guys know that the DoD grant got funded!"
*Brandon and Gerard start excitedly talking, but I had no idea to which grant he was referring. I knew they weren't referring to the spring break grant, but I didn't realize any other grants had been submitted. So I stood there being confused yet excited for them 'Yayyy you guys have money for this mysterious project but I really don't know what I'm cheering about right now.'*
Then Gerard turns to me, kind of laughing, and says, "Courtney, do you want to do your Ph.D.?"
WHAT?! I was not expecting this at all. Was he joking?? Maybe he was joking? But was he serious??
I think I responded something like this: "Yes! Wait really?? But yes yes yes I do want to. But really?"
"Yes, this is me formally extending an offer to you. We get the money in September, so you'll start right away." (Again, he was kind of laughing. I'm sure he was entertained by how flustered I was haha.)
"YES. Yes I want to! Yay I'm so excited!" as I throw my hands up in the air.
Brandon starts talking about how great this was and how cool it is that I will have such a clearly defined project right from the get-go.
I'm still in awe. I have to remind them that I have no idea what they are talking about and could they please explain to me what this "clearly defined project" of mine is going to be? Turns out, the grant funding was for a project directly related to the work I had been doing for the last few days. Gerard said he was crossing his fingers hoping that I performed well -- without me realizing it, those three days of work were like my mini trial period for the grant project.

And that was how I was admitted into the Ph.D. program.

As I left the lab later that night, I immediately called Mom and Dad. We were all freaking out excitedly together, which I loved. I walked home that night seeing New York in a whole new light. This city would be my home for the next 5+ years. I was ecstatic. Everywhere I looked was beautiful. I tried to take photos of the city to capture how amazing everything was, but the photos really are not great or exciting like I wanted them to be. I'll post them here though so I can always remember how I viewed New York that night.

The next morning I went into lab LITERALLY wondering if it was a dream and if I had made the whole thing up. I actually had to double-check with Brandon to see if it was real. I was so convinced that I may have made it up though, that I couldn't even ask him outright. I had to wait to see if he brought it up first or find a way to subtly bring it up. He assured me that it was real. *Phew, that would have been embarrassing.* I loved how excited my fellow lab mates were for me and I immediately felt so at home there. What a great place to be for the next several years.

(Attempting to capture how much I love the UWS)

Amsterdam

87th brownstones

86th entrance to Central Park

The Reservoir

COLUMBIA, GET READY. 

Dr. Courtney coming to you 2023 (... or 2024... or whenever my prof. decides to graduate me).

(Thank you Arianne Marie for the beautiful photos! Last one is film ☺️)